About Allan
Allan Herem helps people cope with stress, anxiety, relationship problems, parenting strain, low self-esteem, and depression. He is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, and he draws on 23 years of practice in California.
Background and approach
Allan speaks plainly with people and focuses on practical steps to feel better and connect more with others. Allan keeps sessions direct and compassionate.
He listens for patterns that cause pain, like communication breakdowns, abandonment worries, control issues, or repeated conflict. Then he partners with the person to try small, workable changes.
These may include clearer boundaries, different ways to talk with partners, or strategies to manage overwhelming feelings. He also helps people facing family of origin problems, fatherhood concerns, caregiver stress, divorce and separation, and infidelity.
Conversations often look at past wounds that still shape today’s choices. The goal is less rehashing and more useful steps forward.
Allan’s work addresses guilt, shame, emptiness, impulsivity, and commitment fears. Sessions aim to make difficult emotions easier to name and handle.
He emphasizes regular practice between meetings so new habits take hold. People who choose Allan can use video calls, phone sessions, live chat, or text-based messaging.
He works in English and provides care from his California practice. To begin, people complete a brief questionnaire and schedule a session that fits their timing.
Approaches that guide online sessions and practical benefits
Allan relies on evidence-based therapeutic techniques that focus on relationships and emotional patterns. One common approach looks at attachment and abandonment themes to show how past hurts shape current relationships; this helps people notice patterns and try different ways of relating. Another approach concentrates on communication skills and problem-solving, teaching clear ways to state needs, set boundaries, and respond to conflict without escalation.Choosing the right approach is a collaborative process. Allan works with each person to identify goals, try methods that fit their situation, and adjust the plan over time. He helps people weigh what feels useful and what needs to change, so therapy stays practical and goal-oriented.
Online therapy formats include video calls, phone sessions, live chat, and text-based messaging, offering real flexibility. Video is useful for a full conversation and nonverbal cues. Phone sessions can be easier when bandwidth is limited or a camera isn’t wanted. Live chat and text messaging work well for quick check-ins, short updates, or ongoing support between longer sessions. These options make it easier to fit therapy into busy lives and keep work moving forward without extra travel time.
Frequently asked questions
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Specialties and expertise
Top specialties
- Stress, Anxiety
- Relationship issues
- Parenting issues
Also works with
- Abandonment
- Attachment issues
- Caregiver issues and stress
- Commitment issues
- Communication problems
- Control issues
- Depression
- Divorce and separation
- Emptiness
- Family of origin issues
- Family problems
- Fatherhood issues
- Forgiveness
- Guilt and shame
- Impulsivity
- Infidelity
- Isolation / loneliness
- Jealousy
- Life purpose
- Men's issues
- Midlife crisis
- Money and financial issues
- Mood disorders
- Self esteem
- Self-love
- Social anxiety and phobia
- Workplace issues
- Young adult issues
- Experience
- 23 years
- Licensed
- California
- Languages
- English